A Seaman's Wife Speaks Up

My Father

islander0413 — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 22:30:07 +0000

What I thought as a genuine desire of my father to let go of his vices has, unluckily, turned out to be just another of his not too popular ploys to get us to side with him. It happened before and it has happened again. I couldn’t say the telltale signs weren’t there, but I chose to believe that this time, he was finally going to strive to win over his alcohol and nicotine addiction, but it appears that the world has won again.

He’s my father and no matter how many mistakes he does, nothing could change the fact that fact.

I have suspected this all along, but I held on to the glimmer of hope that finally, after more than 40 years, he’s finally getting over his addiction. But then again, I shouldn’t lose all hope. Why should I become despondent over my father’s state when God hasn’t given up on him?

Perhaps, he’s the cross that I’ve got to carry. I couldn’t promise to carry my cross with patience, but I can sure promise to try the way I’ve tried for the past years. I just pray for God to guide me in everything I do and help me watch my tongue so I can be of help to my father…

What Do I Want To Be?

islander0413 — Sun, 20 Sep 2009 22:22:42 +0000

What do I want to be?

I have first met this question in my younger days. Back when my eyes still reflected childish innocence, my stance reflected absolute trust and I was still the naive and unspoiled me… naive to think that everything in the world was rose colored; thinking that everyday of my life, I would have the presence of my loved ones within reach each time I need them. But alas, in real life, that’s just not to be!

What did I want to be back then? Hmmm, let me travel for a moment back into my childhood. Let me wander inside my chest of memories and rummage through the piled-up treasures…

I remember wanting to be like those stars gracing the silver screen — the singers because back then, my grandpa would encourage us to sing. He would make us, his grandchildren, compete with each other and our stage had been the long dining table. Oh, I always won; not because I sang the best but because I was my grandfather’s pet.

Then I grew up. And the answer to the question “What do I want to be?” evolved the way I evolved from childhood to young adulthood. At this time, the dream to invade the stage all but fizzled out — gone! At this point, I wanted to just write. In my college days, I used to be a part of the editorial staff of my school paper and I loved the experience. I loved being able to let my feelings and thoughts out in the open through the pen. I loved the relief when I could pour out those pent-up things inside my chest which remarkably made me feel a whole lot better, my heart too much lighter. But journalism in college just wasn’t in the options. I was a working student and no school in the city where I lived offered the course. I took up education half heartedly instead — half heartedly because I never planned nor dreamed to be a teacher. I wanted to be something else. I wanted to be someone I can never be.

The years rolled by — I have finally completed my degree and have worked as a teacher for the past twelve years — an experience I find fulfilling and overwhelming at the same time. Inside the classroom, I could be a clown, I could be an actress, I could be a counselor, I could be a friend, I could be a confidante, I could be a director, I could be an artist, I could be anything I think myself to be. With my students, I have been able to explore areas in my personality which I haven’t even realized was there all along. Yes, I never wanted to be a teacher; but I have fully understood now that it was God’s plan that I be a teacher so I can explore the full potential of my being me —–because that’s what He always wanted.

I now have children. Children whose lives are still slowly unfolding like pretty rosebuds just starting to open and bloom —lives that are, as of now, still filled with uncertainties —because only the Supreme Being up there knows for sure what He has planned for my daughters. The song “Que Sera, Sera” voice my sentiments exactly:

Que sera, sera; whatever will be, will be

The future’s not ours to see

Que sera sera…

What do I want to be?

I still ask myself the question. I have never stopped asking myself the question. But every time I do, I find myself thinking more of my daughters’ welfare — not my own anymore. I find myself weaving dreams for my children. I find myself looking forward into the unknown future trying to visualize what kind of lives my daughters will lead. And when I do, I find myself praying that God will be the wind beneath my daughters’ wings. That God will keep my girls under the security and safety of His loving care and protection.

My children are not my own. They are simply entrusted to me by God to nurture, to care for and to love. I could never claim perfection as a parent — I can only pray for God’s guidance on how I can guide my girls nearer to God.

What do I want to be? I ask myself again…

And my answer is this: To be a responsible caretaker of the most precious gifts I have ever received from God — my husband and my daughters.

Why the Tears?

islander0413 — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 02:04:54 +0000

My eyes are puffy, my nose has become too stuffy and my head has been pounding continuously. If you think I caught the cold virus, you can’t be more mistaken. The symptoms mentioned are actually after – effects of too much crying. Yes, I am not ashamed to admit I’ve been crying my eyes off for half the day eversince I received the text message from Sir Arvin at around 1:30 PM stating that nothing we could do or say could prevent him from leaving EVNHS because if he declines, he’d be charged for insubordination — the office order has been signed, that’s why.

So why the tears? I should be in a celebratory mood because my partner in crime is finally promoted — been chosen to take on a greater responsibility knowing that he is very much capable of doing it. Deep within I am happy for him because I know he deserves it, but telltale hints suggest that something is very wrong with this sudden promotion — a promotion in name only because the position and the salary aren’t upgraded. Why so sudden? Why wasn’t he even formally and personally called to the Division Office to be informed of such? I could go on and on with a list of questions that start with “Why?”, but nothing could stop the inevitable — Sir Arvin is still leaving EVNHS.

Why the tears? Why indeed?

I cry not only because I will miss a friend, a confidante, a counselor and an artistic colleague, but mostly because of the FACT that my friend isn’t happy with it and feels that he is but a sacrificial lamb. My heart breaks because I see his demeanor crumbling down — the confidence gone and buried with the mire of despair and uncertainty. I don’t want to look him straight in the eyes because I see the tears brimming just below the surface. I don’t want to see his inner strength shattering. And he knows he is at a dead end. He knows that though the taste is bitter, he’s got to glob whatever laid in his platter.

But then, God is always at the helm, I know HE is. He isn’t blind to everything that’s happening. He sees the hundreds of hearts that’s breaking because of this and I am sure that in time, the pain will heal to usher in a new hope — the hope that when the right time comes, my partner in crime will be back where he belongs — he will be back not as the partner in crime at my workplace anymore, but a head of office worthy of my respect and reverence .

In God’s perfect time, I am SURE it will happen.

Saturday Rant

islander0413 — Sun, 16 Aug 2009 02:02:23 +0000

There are people who, driven by their personal interests, sacrifice and compromise the good of the majority. There are selfish people who do their best and try every means to get their hands on that certain something they so desperately spent a lot of money on to get…. and have selfishly achieved at the expense of a lot of people — DAMN THEM ALL TO HELL!

What I am talking about?

Intelligent people know what I am talking about. Those who are intelligent but have chosen to be silent and to appear ignorant because of a fear for something or someone — or because they seek a special favor from someone —- are nothing short of spinelessness and deserve to be condemned ; if not on earth, then in the afterlife.

I am mad as hell. I am fuming with rage because despite every desperate measure we thought of and did, we were unsuccessful…. iba na talaga ang kinang ng pabor lalo na’t may padulas na hindi mantika!

Pagaba baya pod kung manggamit ta ug tawo, no? Pero kung ang tawo wala nay konsensya kay ang importante niya ug unsa ray makalipay niya, wala sad tay mahimo ana kay iya sad nang kinaiyahan. Iya-iya ra man jud ug kinaiya ang tawo…. pero bason pod unta ug wala magpiyong adtong higayona si “BRO” aron iyang paambakan ug kilat ang mga tawong walay atay ug batikolon… hasta ang kasingkasing naduhigan na sa kaitom sa pagkahakog ug pagkamapahimuslanon sa gahom.

Pero mao ra jud ni ang kataposan sa akong sinulad nga undanon pero way unod para sa nangaigo: I MIGHT HAVE LOST FAITH IN THE HUMANITY OF MAN, BUT I WILL NEVER LOSE FAITH IN MY GOD.

Walking Away With Grace and Dignity

islander0413 — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 13:57:31 +0000

A month back, I wrote an article containing my gripe about how I have been assigned to do a certain task which I honestly do not know anything about – that of being a Referee for Volleyball Men. While most people would argue that to approach a higher official and plead for relief from the task is more appropriate than venting out on a local paper in an expose, all I can say is this: I KNOW WHAT I KNOW AND I HAVE NOTHING TO EXPLAIN TO ANYONE. I have tried the suggestion, ladies and gentlemen, when I first found out I was one of the Officiating Officials during the Siquijor Day Sports Tournament, but was I listened to? No! My plea fell on deaf ears — inconsiderate ears to be exact. I did the job during the Siquijor Sports Tournament not because I wanted to do it but because I was literally forced to do it. To have done it a second time during the Provincial Meet would have been nothing short of insanity especially that I am a complete ignoramus where the game is concerned.

I have just been informed that a response was written for that write-up. Well and good. I didn’t mention any names in that article so I get the ultimate idea that the one who’s cackling must be the one laying the eggs… hehehehe — or must be one of the hens laying the gold plated eggs. I haven’t read the response just yet and I still haven’t figured out if I even want to read it because I already am informed of the gist of the response. What’s important to me is that, if my article elicited a response, it must be something worth responding to. I don’t care if I get demerits for doing what I had to do as long as I know I have gotten my message across. If I had to appear the horned devil to those people who have been stung by the acid of my words, it’s a sacrifice I am more than willing to make if it will mean a more considerate assignment to each and every teacher within the Division the next time around.

Shall I lash back? I had been challenged by friends who understood what I was going through — and I am sure many teachers would suggest the same to me. But no. I wouldn’t write anything in response to “the response” , I am very sorry. I choose to walk from this situation with grace and dignity knowing that if I do it, it would appear I am on the defense. I would like to leave things as is — with the people writing the response appearing defensive to everyone who have read and felt the sentiment of the article I have written. I choose to keep my silence knowing that sometimes, silence can be more eloquent than words…

Kasinatian sa Siquijor Provincial Hospital

islander0413 — Sat, 10 Jan 2009 03:42:02 +0000

Ako magpahayag lamang sa akong kasinatian diha sa atong gikaintapan ng Siquijor Provincial Hospital. Gikaintapan tungod kay sa panultihon pa sa mga nakatilaw sa iyang lala, ang pasyente nga piskay pa nga isulod, kung magkalisod, mahiuli sa balay, anaa na man sa lungon magtingkagol.

Nakasulod mi karong bag-ohay lang dihang ang akong anak nga 5 anyos gihilantan sugod petsa 1 bulan sa Enero. Ug kay nalisang na man ko nga posibleng dengue ang sakit sa bata kay ikaupat ka adlaw na man dihang miadto mi adtong petsa 4, Dominggo aron magpa blood test unta. Kay dili man sila mo laboratory ug weekends kung dili admission, midesisyon na lang ko nga iadmit aron mapaneguro ang kinabuhi sa kong anak. Kalooy sa Dios, ang platelet count sa akong anak unang kuha pa lamang sa blood test, 269. Sa upat ka adlaw nga hilanat, eliminated na ang posibilidad nga naay dengue ang bata. Ang Emergency Room staff, nasigaw adtong higayona pag atubang niadtong tiguwang lalaki nga giatake ug high blood, mao nga dugay nga nasulod sa kwarto ang akong pasyente ug sa tanto nakong hikap hikap niya, akong nasangkilan ang dakong bugol sa iyang bulog. Mao kadako sa kumo sa bata ang bugol ug nasantop na dayon sa akong hunahuna nga ang akong anak, posibleng adunay urinary tract infection nga maoy nakapahilanat niya.

Giresetahan mi ug Ceforuxime (Zefsur) ug Ranitidine. Puros intravenous medicines nga unta ang gitambalan bata man nga 5 anyos ug makatulon man pod unta ug liquids. Ang Ceforuxime, nasayod kong usa ka matang sa antibiotics. Pero ang Ranitidine, wala ko mahibalo ug unsay iyang indication kay wala man nako siya ma research. Ang ako lang gipaningala kay inig human ug inject sa Ranitidine, bisan unta abtik nga magdula dula ang akong anak, mokalit lang kaluya dayon makatulog. Inig mata, moluko sa kasakit sa tiyan unya imbes nga molagsik, nagkaluya na man hinoon. Ang akong igsoon nga usa ka nurse ug nag estudyo usab pagka doktor sa Amerika, perting sukoa nga nahibalo sa tambal nga gidapat. Ug gawas pa, wala man magreklamo ang akong anak nga sakit kaayo ang tiyan. Ranitidine. I have found out through websearch that Ranitidine is an antacid. The most common brand name of which is Zantac.

Here is what I have gleaned after researching about Ranitidine:

What is ranitidine?

Ranitidine is in a group of drugs called histamine-2 blockers. Ranitidine works by reducing the amount of acid your stomach produces.

Ranitidine is used to treat and prevent ulcers in the stomach and intestines. It also treats conditions in which the stomach produces too much acid, such as Zollinger-Ellison syndrome. Ranitidine also treats gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) and other conditions in which acid backs up from the stomach into the esophagus, causing heartburn.

Nganong gihatagan man ug Ranitidine ang akong anak nga wala may hyperacidity??? Naay sakit sa tiyan ang akong anak, pero kay nakita man unta sa doktor ang dakong lusay sa bulog sa bata nga klarong sintomas sa UTI, nahibalo na unta pod siya nga ang sakit sa tiyan especially just below the rib cage is also a symptom of urinary tract infection. The symptoms of UTI are as follows:

Symptoms of a urinary tract infection (UTI) may include:

Pain or burning when you urinate.
An urge to urinate frequently but usually passing only small amounts of urine.
Dribbling (inability to control urine release).
Pain or a feeling of heaviness in your lower abdomen.
Reddish or pinkish urine.
Foul-smelling urine.
Cloudy urine.
Pain in your back just below the rib cage, on one side of your body (flank pain).
Fever and chills.
Nausea and vomiting.

Tungod sa akong kabalaka kay akong nakita nga ang akong anak nga imbes mapiskay nisamot na man hinoon kaluya, midesisyon na pod ko nga ibalhin sa Dumaguete and bata Enero 6 sayo sa buntag. Sa gihatag namo nga referral, ang diagnosis, DENGUE FEVER! Dengue sa ilang mata nga unang kuha pa lamang sa blood test, ang platelet count pwerte na mang taasa? After 3 blood tests, giarangan nag kuha ug blood sample ang akong anak kay consistent man nga taas. Or basin baya gibungaw si doktora ug nagtoo siya nga ang naay dengue ang akong anak kay sa dihang mi round siya anang petsa 5 sa undto, perti man niyang hulbot sa tiil ug hing ingon nga nawala ang rashes. Nawala jud tinuod ang rashes kay wala gud daan diha. Ang naay dengue ang among kauban nga pasyente nga gitransport sa Dumaguete early morning of January 5 ug dili ang akong anak. Makapangutana ko ug unsa ba kahay gisulat sa medical records sa akong anak nga mura man ug wala sa buot? Mura man lang ug gidulaan ang kinabuhi sa tawo. Mao ba diay na ang ilang gihuralan nga Hippocratic Oath nga unta kung atong basahon klaro man kaayo nga kung ikaw doktor, imong obligasyon nga ampingan ang kinabuhi gawas na gyud kung ang kahigayonan dili na gyud mobulig.

The Hippocratic Oath
(Modern Version)

I SWEAR in the presence of the Almighty and before my family, my teachers and my peers that according to my ability and judgment I will keep this Oath and Stipulation.

TO RECKON all who have taught me this art equally dear to me as my parents and in the same spirit and dedication to impart a knowledge of the art of medicine to others. I will continue with diligence to keep abreast of advances in medicine. I will treat without exception all who seek my ministrations, so long as the treatment of others is not compromised thereby, and I will seek the counsel of particularly skilled physicians where indicated for the benefit of my patient.

I WILL FOLLOW that method of treatment which according to my ability and judgment, I consider for the benefit of my patient and abstain from whatever is harmful or mischievous. I will neither prescribe nor administer a lethal dose of medicine to any patient even if asked nor counsel any such thing nor perform the utmost respect for every human life from fertilization to natural death and reject abortion that deliberately takes a unique human life.

WITH PURITY, HOLINESS AND BENEFICENCE I will pass my life and practice my art. Except for the prudent correction of an imminent danger, I will neither treat any patient nor carry out any research on any human being without the valid informed consent of the subject or the appropriate legal protector thereof, understanding that research must have as its purpose the furtherance of the health of that individual. Into whatever patient setting I enter, I will go for the benefit of the sick and will abstain from every voluntary act of mischief or corruption and further from the seduction of any patient.

WHATEVER IN CONNECTION with my professional practice or not in connection with it I may see or hear in the lives of my patients which ought not be spoken abroad, I will not divulge, reckoning that all such should be kept secret.

WHILE I CONTINUE to keep this Oath unviolated may it be granted to me to enjoy life and the practice of the art and science of medicine with the blessing of the Almighty and respected by my peers and society, but should I trespass and violate this Oath, may the reverse by my lot.

Pag-abot namo sa Holy Child Hospital, gi withdraw ang tanang tambal nga dili mao ug giilisan. Hasta ang dextrose sa bata gitangtang. Kalooy sa Dios, sukad mi na admit buntag sa Enero 6 hangtod sa among pag discharge Enero 8, wala na gyud mohilanat o moluya ang bata. Kuyawan lang ko maghunahuna nga kung nahurot ang 5 ka ampoules pag inject sa bata, unsa kahay mahitabo nga 3 pa lang gani ang nahurot, moluko na man pag ayo sa kasakit sa tiyan — kadtong sakit sa tiyan klarong indikasyon nga dili kaagwanta ang atay sa kakusog sa tambal. Nagsugod na sad kagamay ang iyang ikaihi imbes unta nga daghan na ug sugod human madapati sa Ceforuxime — posibleng indikasyon usab nga ang kidneys nagkalisod na pod.

Nasayud ko nga ang akong kasinatian, kasinatian usab sa kadaghanan sa mga pobreng lumulopyo niining atong lalawigan nga tungod sa kawad-on, walay laing mahimo kun dili mopalaban sa atong tambalanan nga imbes makaayo, makapatay na man hinoon. KInsa may angay nga basolon, ang atong pamunuang panlalawigan ba nga wala magpakabana sa atong tambalanan nga unta nasayud man sila nga ang atong mga residente walay laing madaganan dinhi sa atong probinsiya? Ang mga propesyonal ba nga tungod sa kagamay sa sweldo, mura na lang ug magtapol sa pagtrabaho sa ilang gihuralan nga katungdanan ug magdula dula na lang sa kinabuhi …. dili na lang gani mobasa aron madugangan ang ilang kaalam sa medisina? O ang tagtungod nga tungod sa kawad-on, magmantinil na lang ug admit aning atong hospital bisan nagkuba ang dughan nga bisan unsang orasa, motikig ang pasyente nga paggikan sa balay perting piskaya?

Ug mangutana sad ko kon nganong dili man maka avail ug laboratory exam ang usa ka tawo inig weekends kung dili mopa admit nga naa man untay nag duty nga medical technologist? Mahimo ba diay ang usa ka public hospital nga modili ani nga mga prebilihiyo sa usa ka pasyente? Ihulat pa ba diay sa Lunes ang lab exams kung life and death situation na ang pagahisgutan? Karon pa ko kadungog ug hospital nga dili mo laboratory sa out-patients kung Sabado ug Dominggo.

Kung kita diskuntento sa atong sweldo, wala man pod untay nagsugo nato nga maoy atong pilion ning klase nga trabaho, mas maayo pa tingali nga mogawas na lang ug mangitag laing trabaho nga daling makadatu kaysa magpabilin nga mag-among among ug kinabuhi kay sa katapusan, ang atong binuhatan nga dinautan mobalik ra gihapon nato… matud pa sa katapusang linya sa Hippocratic Oath :Should I trespass and violate this Oath, may the reverse by my lot.

Bason unta… mao nay gitawag ug karma.

I Am Me!

islander0413 — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 15:25:52 +0000

Reflecting About Contentment

islander0413 — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 15:23:15 +0000

Has man gotten too greedy to resort to sneaking behind an unknowing person and stab him without warning so he could get his greedy hands on the single piece of bread the unsuspecting person holds in his hand?

Has man’s covetousness transcended from what’s appealing to the flesh and the senses to what could make the pocket heavier and the wallet thicker notwithstanding the fact that in this selfish pursuit, there’s a likelihood that everything unpleasant that’s being sowed will boomerang any moment and instead of hitting the innocent target, the weapon thrown actually ricochets to smack and damage one’s own face?

Has man’s unquenchable thirst for wealth and more wealth made him more of the beast that he was created to dominate and tame than the considerate overseer of everything glorious and good that God created on earth?

Has man’s gluttonous and narcissistic nature been made more uncontrollable by the devil that he forgets how it is to pause for a while and contemplate if the God he claims to worship, praise and glorify is really still the same God reigning supreme in his heart and not the horned and red-eyed liar?

We’ve been blessed by God in countless ways yet we always fall short of being appreciative of everything we have been blessed with. It’s because we measure our blessings with how many appliances we own, how much we have in our bank account, how many children we have sent to college, how many cars we have purchased or how big and magnificent the house we have bought or built. We almost always equate success with what’s materially measurable, but failed to really take in that what’s more intensely appealing and worthy of thankfulness are the intangible gifts: good health, inner peace, harmonious family, fruitful career. When we feel envious of our neighbors, it isn’t because we don’t have the things they own, but because we fail to assess just how much of the non-material gifts we have been endowed with.

In our attempt to meet the drive of achieving and earning more, we no longer care if we hurt others along the way — we don’t show concern for a relative whom we have knowingly robbed of their only source of livelihood because we only think of our own insatiable appetite for wealth, power and prestige. How lowly a life to live — and yet, these kind of people pretend to be kind-hearted individuals who genuinely care for others — the wolves in sheep’s clothing ready to devour an unsuspecting ignoramus. It’s sad to think that there are times when some people driven by selfish motives feel the need to degrade and harm family and friends if they happen to get in the way of their mercenary plan.

Well, most of these people succeed in their scheming and selfish means, but my gut feeling tells me it isn’t God who helped them get everything ironed out. Does God allow it? Yes, He does — but who ultimately gets to pay the price? It’s still the selfish person who doesn’t get content with everything God blessed him with despite the evident affluence and prestige. And since He doesn’t get content, God sends him more — cancer, hypertension, diabetes, psychological defects, and many more.

Anything sneaky and underhanded that’s done against a fellow mortal will rebound. Anything sought after that isn’t according to the light and truth of God will not be found. There will always be a price tag to everything done that isn’t according to God’s righteousness and oftentimes, it’s a price tag that spells disease, marital problems, juvenile delinquent children, and more….

Isn’t it said that the richest person isn’t the one who has the most but the one who is content with the little he possesses?

And yes, this one’s for you… whoever you are. Merry Christmas!

Oasis of Love?

islander0413 — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 13:48:38 +0000

The annual Oasis of Love will soon be held once again —

Oasis of Love — what a nice picture to conjure. An oasis is a presence of water and plants in a desert. So an oasis of love must be something which transcends the spiritual realm. It must be a refuge of those whose faith have dried up by reintroducing it to the real fountain of LOVE himself — GOD. I wonder if the Oasis of Love was able to live up to this ideal….

I have been employed here for six years and within that period of time; I haven’t been to any Oasis of Love gatherings. Oh, there were always those “checking of attendance” chuchus and “being asked to explain why one did not attend” blahblahs, but who cares? I am Catholic, but I haven’t made myself a member of the Oasis of Love — neither do I have plans of being a member in the coming days. My school head says it’s compulsory, I’m sorry but I beg to disagree.

Why?

The 1987 Constitution of the Philippines declares: The separation of Church and State shall be inviolable. (Article II, Section 6), and, No law shall be made respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof. The free exercise and enjoyment of religious profession and worship, without discrimination or preference, shall forever be allowed. No religious test shall be required for the exercise of civil or political rights. (Article III, Section 5).

There’s more …

Article 2 of the 1987 Constitution of the Philippines declares separation of church and state. Article 3 forbids the government from passing any law concerning religion or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, guarantees free exercise of religion and forbids the use of any religious test for public office. Churches and religious institutions are tax-exempt. No public money may be spent in support of any religion. The teaching of religious classes in public schools is permitted with the written consent of the parent so long as provided there is no cost to the government.

My non-Catholic colleagues and I plan to report to school on that day, since it is a working day. But with what I have read from the Constitution, is it really fair to hold it in a school day when DepEd is a government agency and it is a religious activity?

I am not against religion and moral and spiritual growth. I just hate seeing those saintly looking __________ gathered together —

The reason for the reaction started years ago …

I remember when as an adolescent living in Ozamiz City, there were religious barangay organizations known as GSK’s (Gagmayng Simbahananong Katilingban). Each week, these small groups would gather for prayer meetings. But instead of the prayers and reflections, instead of God’s glorification, the attendees would criticize the members who weren’t present. The practice went on for a few months … then I started refusing to attend. I couldn’t see any point in hypocrisy, I am sorry. I know God doesn’t enjoy it one bit, either.

Anyway, no matter how much other people claim godliness and religiousness, in the end, the best judge of character, good works and clean heart will never be those religious bigwigs and the spiritual trying hards who talk and act as though they are the most learned (pronounce: ler-ned) where spirituality and religion are concerned, but the God of Fairness, Justice and Love.

I am not religious…never have been, never will be. But I can boast of my faith. Being religious doesn’t necessarily mean faithfulness anyway and faithfulness can’t also be manifested by being religious….

For My Gift From God

islander0413 — Sat, 13 Dec 2008 14:32:28 +0000

I still remember clearly the “single years” — my years of hoping and praying that MR. RIGHT will show himself before me all garbed in his “knight in shining armour” gear. I envisioned him to be my protector; someone to shield me from everything that would cause me harm.

Along the course of that lonely and seemingly hopeless searches, there were those “trees” along the path —readily promising shade and comfort when looked at from a considerable distance but really offering nothing at all — a mirage of the happiness so much desired….

My illusions had been shattered, my heart broken into millions of tiny fragments. But I have always moved on, picking up all the broken bits and pieces and slowly mending my disillusioned and tattered self esteem… always holding on to hope…

Then from out of the blue, my prince appeared —just when I thought everything was bleak and dreary, he came to me bringing roses in the rain and making me believe in love all over again…

So, for the love of my life, I write these lines…

Plo,

You are the greatest blessing that God has given me. We have been through so much and will still go through so much, I know. But as long as we hold each other’s hands and not let go, as long as we believe in the strength of our love for each other, and as long as we keep JESUS the glue that binds us together, we will make it through every storm towards another sunshine….

If there ever was a situation that I am thankful for, it was knowing you in my moment of deepest despair and you changed my life in many ways. If there ever was a day which I am thankful for, it was was that fateful day when you took me in your life and made me your wife…

You are more than just my destiny…you, to me, are the gift that God has wrapped especially for me…

Thank you for staying a gift through all these years. I am happy having you…and I am not even through unwrapping the carefully wrapped package of your person which is slowly revealed to me each moment we’re together. And I tell myself that God must love me so much to have blessed me with a special person…a husband, a best friend, a confidante, a brother, a lover….all wrapped in a beautiful present called EFREN PALACIO…

Jing